Suicide/Toxification/Obtaining drugs

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"The most difficult question, after deciding when is the right time to die, is where to get the drugs that will work quickly and painlessly. It is not as simple as some people think. For instance, one woman wrote this note to me: "I enclose two dollars. Please send one pill for me and one for my friend Mary."

-- Derek Humphry, Final Exit


There are several ways of obtaining drugs, the easiest being, as of 2008, via an international online pharmacy (IOP); Example: PharEx.Biz as of 2013, there were many other potentially more viable alternatives listed in The Peaceful Pill Handbook, including Chinese and Mexican suppliers. The legality of these acquisition methods varies from drug to drug and country to country.

Ordering over the Internet[edit]

Is ordering medicines on-line legal?[edit]

We will cover this question first, since it is pretty important for many people. The answer depends on your country, what kind of medicine you plan on ordering, and in which amounts. Most western countries would allow importation for personal use, with the amount of medicine limited to a 1-3 month's dose. Additional information is available in the Laws, Regulations, and Enforcement subforum on

Country Status
Germany Strict regulations. Mail-ordering medicines is allowed, but restricted to EU member countries. However, ordering prescription (non-controlled) medicines from outside the EU is only a minor infringement, resulting in a small fine. Ordering controlled medicines is a criminal offense and usually results a in high fine.
USA See this link.

Legal difference between prescription and controlled drugs[edit]

It is important to understand a significant legal difference between prescription drugs and controlled drugs.

  • Prescription drugs are medicines which (in theory) should only be taken under a doctor's care, or which may have harmful interactions with other substances, but which are not addictive and have no recreational use. For example, penicillin is a prescription drug but not a controlled substance. Pharmacies are not allowed to sell it without a prescription, but most countries allow importation for personal use, whether by mail or in person.
  • Controlled drugs are mostly narcotic substances that are addictive and can be abused. All controlled drugs require a prescription but in addition, the manufacture, importation, possession, and distribution of controlled drugs is strictly regulated by international treaties and local laws (for the USA, see the Controlled Substances Act). For example, morphine is a controlled substance and thus it is a criminal offense to import, manufacture or to even possess it without a prescription.

This difference is very important in practice: I am not aware of any case when anyone was prosecuted for importation of non-controlled prescription drugs. Importation of controlled drugs is, in fact, illegal and can lead to criminal charges. Read about one case here. Additional information is available in the Laws, Regulations, and Enforcement subforum on

Drug Legal status
Amitriptyline (Endep, Elatrol, Elavil, Laroxyl, Trepiline, Tryptanol, Tryptizol) Prescription, non-controlled
Dextropropoxyphene (Darvocet, Darvon) Controlled, US Schedule IV
Cimetidine (Tagamet, Tagamet HB) OTC in USA, prescription in Europe
Domperidone (Motilium) OTC in Europe, not approved in the USA (but not a controlled drug)
Pentobarbital (Nembutal) Controlled, US Schedule II
Prochlorperazine (Buccastem, Compazine, Phenotil, Stemetil) Prescription (?), OTC in the UK in buccal form as Buccastem
All benzodiazepines: diazepam (Valium), midazolam (Dormicum), etc. Controlled, US Schedule IV

One important thing to note is that benzodiazepines ('benzos' in slang) like Valium and Dormicum are in fact controlled substances. This is often overseen. Some people in Germany had their houses raided and searched by police because they ordered Valium over the Internet.

The legal status of benzodiazepines is differentiated per medicine. Some benzodiazepines, like flunitrazepam, are more heavily regulated.

What happens if my delivery is confiscated?[edit]

First, you will receive a letter similar to this one (provided by

Most of the online reliable pharmacies will re-ship your order if it has been confiscated just once, but they will ask you to provide them with an alternative address for a second delivery. E-mail them to make those arrangements.

There are some countries, where the policy of the customs office is more strict than in other countries. Thus you may consider finding out first if the drug you wish to buy is considered a controlled substance in your country or not (sometimes the drug is a prescription one but not a controlled one, which may mean that it is legal to buy it from abroad). There are on-line sources for finding about the legality of this action in your country. For example, an Australian might google:

"Australian law+controlled substances list" or "Australian law+purchasing meds abroad"

Also, in some countries, there is a permit to buy a certain amount of a substance for personal use, which would be illegal to purchase if greater amounts were purchased. In other places, even if the drug is considered a prescription drug, but yet not a controlled one, the authorities would tend to overlook the packages which contain like 90 pills for personal use - even if they did open it and see what was there.

If in your country the personal purchase of controlled substances would mean prison time, you might consider using other drug cocktails or other methods for your method of choice (preferably one of the ones mentioned on this wiki's main page).

Can I get fake medicines if I order on the Internet?[edit]

Do not be scared by newspaper reports and information of your local drug administration authority. Often, quality generics are named "fake" just because the producer didn't pay patent fees. Such drugs may be indistinguishable from the originals but legally they are counterfeit.

Experience says that there is little sense for a counterfeiter to make knock-offs of inexpensive drugs. There is no economical advantage in making, say, counterfeit Elavil when a real generic drug is available in retail for $0.13 per pill. But drugs that have a market price of $1-$3 per pill (like Valium and Viagra) are indeed often counterfeited or "watered down." Keep in mind:

  • Choosing a trusted pharmacy with a good reputation is important.
  • If you have received your ordered medicine already and are not sure whether it is the real thing, ask on or the ASM newsgroup if someone could give you an opinion on the pharmacy and the drug (do not name the pharmacy in public, though).
  • For drugs with potential for recreational use, like benzodiazepines (Valium) or barbiturates (phenobarbital), there are inexpensive test kits available that are normally used for drug screening. The problem with test kits, though, is that they will not tell you whether the drug is watered down or not.

Choosing a reliable pharmacy[edit]

The first step to ordering on-line is, obviously, to choose a reliable on-line pharmacy. Unless you have a wealth of time and money, do not just google "order Valium."

The Golden "rules"

  • Find out whether a pharmacy exists for more than five years or not. Good sources usually exist and prove their reliability for many years.
  • If an on-line pharmacy offers deals or substances which sound like they are too good to be true (e.g. a whole pack of Valium for $2 only), then it should be a red flag for you. Be careful, and avoid ordering from them.
  • is a website that maintains lists of various on-line pharmacies with ratings by members (i.e. people that have used those pharmacies and can speak from experience), plus forums for pharmacy discussions. Hint: registration is not required for accessing pharmacy lists at, and so just click the "US list" or "International list".
  • Ask on ASH or ASM whether someone is willing to send you pharmacy information per e-mail, since the people from those newsgroups often discuss their experiences with obtaining drugs there and thus they may have valuable information for you. Please never publish Internet addresses of on-line pharmacies in those newsgroups: it is seen as particularly bad etiquette and it will make pharmacies vulnerable for attacks of do-gooders. If someone asks you about pharmacy addresses, or you want to ask someone about them, always do this via e-mail A good and reputable vendor that has been mentioned in several occassions in Pharmacy Reviewer would be PharEx.Biz If you are living inside the United States, this vendor already ships within the United states. Accepts credit cards. Has been around for a very long time. has a thread in Pharmacy Reviewer since 2010. A bit expensive but a sure place to go with.

Renting a post office box[edit]

You may prefer to order a PO box if someone else at home may possibly interfere with the delivery of your medicines. Here is one suggestion (for those living in the United States):

"From: "Fragmented.Perfection" <>
Date: Fri, 6 Jun 2008 13:10:13 -0700 (PDT)
Subject: Re: Obtaining the meds for the Amitriptyline Cocktail... and where to have them sent :\

I would definitely recommend renting a UPS (or other private courier) mailbox and have your meds sent there. That would eliminate the chance of
[others] discovering the meds in the mail and here, at least, my UPS store receives and signs for all packages which saves me a lot of trouble
because then I don't have to worry about being home to sign for a package.

Also, has a thread about having medications sent to a PO Box.

Acquiring an alternate phone number may also be beneficial. There are a few scam artists out there: Wwhile they do accept payment, they do not ship drugs, and once you have fallen for one of their scams, they call you repeatedly with more scam offers as well as threats. Should this happen to you, then disconnecting your alternate phone number will be much less disruptive to your life than disconnecting your main number. Some phone companies offer "multiring" service, which should be the cheapest option; any phone company will let you open a new account for a fee.

How should I pay for the drugs, and what is safest?[edit]

Internet pharmacies usually allow for the following methods of payment:

All of those options leave "traces", in the sense that you can be monitored for transferring the money, although there are methods to conceal Bitcoin transactions. Also, be on your guard with pharmacies that solely require payment via Western Union: there is a slightly higher chance that such a pharmacy is scamming its customers.

If you do not have any credit card, but your on-line pharmacy insists on credit cards only, then you may consider using a secured credit card, a prepaid debit card or something similar. For more information about this, see the article about payment methods on this wiki.

Always keep in mind your safety when purchasing. A good vendor to use as an example would be PharEx.Biz. This vendor accepts Visa and Mastercard. Although they are reported as a very reputable vendor on Pharmacy Reviewer and have no scam reports. They also accept payments via money order payments for some products like their tramadols. And then accept payments via MoneyGram for the Percocet refills. If any company attempts to rip you off wether it be by sending you fake medications or no medications at all. You usually have 60 days to dispute your charge. So they have 60 days to deliver the actual product to you. If you order with someone that does not accept credit cards. You will have a very difficult time getting anything back. If you order with a money order. If the vendor does not delivery anything legitimate, within a matter of 5 business days. You can report the money order as lost. At the place you got it from. You will have the option of getting it again for the same amount or get your money back in cash. If you order via MoneyGram, unless you are ordering from a reputable place like PharEx.Biz, pay via Moneygram. But if it is a very new pharmacy. One that is very unknown, has no mention any where. Stay away from it, either pay with a credit card or money order. Or no other way at all.

Travelling in order to buy drugs[edit]

Taking a trip to a country where drugs are easy to obtain, is a method that is often overseen. The most well-known example is probably the famous Nembutal shopping trips to Mexico organised by Exit International. There are several reasons why taking such a trip may be a good idea:

  • Customs rarely if ever check for medicines in a traveller's luggage. For example, Dr. Nitschke mentions in The Peaceful Pill Handbook that nobody carrying Nembutal in their own luggage ever had problems with Australian customs. At the same time, nearly all attempts to mail Nembutal to one's home ended in seizures by customs. The reason why travelling in person is less risky than postal service is that most tourists and travellers have at least the usual "traveler set" with them, like diarrhoea and headache medications, and perhaps also sleeping pills to help fight the "jet lag". A customs officer has no way to check whether a Chinese tourist traveling to Spanish resorts has valid prescriptions for five pill packs, since that would simply take too long.
  • Some countries prohibit mail-ordering medicines by law, but no country will ever prohibit traveling with medicines: almost every tourist has a few packs with them, like painkillers or diarrhoea pills. That is also the reason why almost no checks happen: customs officers would have to stop tourists and look up every one of their medicines to see whether it is prescription or not, and this would enrage people.

Information about individual drugs[edit]

Although using dextropropoxyphene and a benzodiazepine or two may indeed be peaceful and painless, it would be safer to also add phenobarbital to a drug cocktail.