Guide to Social Activity/Stubborn Difficulties
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"I think I'm ugly"
In as much as there is an objective element to attractiveness, this may well be the case. Remember, however, these five important principles:
- There is a very large subjective element to attractiveness as well.
- Physical attractiveness is not the only aspect of you that a guy cares about.
- Goodness beautifies a person. A joyful countenance, an upbeat and outgoing personality, and a mind or heart that are genuinely engaged or concerned with or about other things and people, will make you more attractive.
- Take care of your appearance. Make the best of what you've got. Perhaps you aren't Sophie Marceau, but by being disciplined in 'doing the basics' (washing, brushing and deodourising), you can make an improvement.
- Bide your time. Strange though it may seem, and contrary to the popular contemporary media, women often get more attractive with age.
"No one would approve"
If your society, friends or family won't approve then the following advice might help:
- Decide on the morality of your move. If you are offending some higher law, then suffer in silence and wait another spring.
- Grasp the thorn. Let those that disapprove know first. Don't go behind folks backs. Don't ask for advice if you're not prepared for it.
- Listen to them. Maybe he is a waste of time, abusive or capricious. Does their point of view ring true?
- Cool off. Sometimes family approval just takes time. Are you prepared to outwait those who object? Are you prepared to take the time to see what truth there is in their opinions.
- Make your position clear. Stand your ground. Your beloved, if he is true, will hurt as much as you do; but be prepared for the consequences. See en:w:Romeo and Julliet!
- And if he really means all that to you: elope.
"He just doesn't notice me"
- This isn't necessarily true. He might be as nervous as you are.
- Also, he might have a reason not to notice you (is he in a relationship?)