Talk:Rhetoric and Composition/Narration

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This is one of the most poorly written paragraphs I've ever read on Wikipedia (and ironically, it's in a section about writing):

"In close relation to the thesis of your narrative, is your awareness of audience. Because your thesis deals directly with the purpose in telling your story, a discussion of audience will inherantly follow in order to apply that purpose to a group. When storytelling, you must give thought to what you would like your audience to leave the piece with. Your purpose should relate directly to the target audience so that the implicit rhetoric does not go unnoticed."

• unecessary comma in the first sentence
• "the purpose in telling your story?" Should be "of" not "in"
• inherantly is spelled inherently
• splitting "leave...with" in "your audience to leave the piece with" sounds retarded, sorry. Why not say "your audience to obtain from the piece" or something less awkward?
• pretentious double-negative in the last sentence

Well, now the above comment is obsolete. Whether the changes I made are up to the reader's standards is another question. Russ Markert

[edit] closing remarks

Not sure the "closing remarks" section heading is very useful. Can we make it more specific? Readers should infer from title what it contains. --Mattbarton.exe 20:19, 29 November 2007 (UTC)